26 February 2010

I don't deserve you

I'm losing you and we both know it's true. We both know you've been fighting long and hard enough. You've been strong for both of us but you get nothing back. I don't get how you can't see that you're better off without me? However we end up don't you ever, EVER, doubt my love. You mean the world to me.

24 February 2010


I get so freaking pissed off when people who probably haven't crawled on the bathroom floor with Anxiety chugging their midriff, been standing by the tracks ready to jump, never been able to sleep for days, been sitting with the knife against their throat. When they say that "you have to accept that life isn't always cheerful and we have to allow ourselves to feel bad".


Well shoot me, it would be a benefacation

No. I don't hear voices.
No. No one touches me in an unpleasant way.
No. I'm not getting abused.
Yes. I have friends.
No. I'm not bullied.
I've got anxiety.
My brain is boiling.
It's my brain that's fucked up.
It never shuts off.
It just keeps going.
It's my brain that's fucked up.
My brain!
Can you hear me?!!

19 February 2010

You suck.

When I have authority you're always louder.
When I'm distinguished you get frumpy.
When I'm absentminded you're giddy.
When I'm open-hearted you tattle.
When I argue you fight.
When I get furious you get hysterical.
When I want to start a relationship,
you fall someone random. Hussy!

18 February 2010

See me

Sometimes I think that if I just stop talking so much, coloured my hair again and bought clothes that aren't black. Studdied harder and worked hard not to seem screwed up. Laughed less and bothered to put makeup on in the morning. Bought new jeans and listened to music that doesn't really mean anything. Maybe then you'd find me interesting.

14 February 2010

I'm sorry, I shouldn't have...

All of you who don't understand.
All the things you don't understand

12 February 2010

I swear it's true

Breath me in. I'm yours to keep.

03 February 2010

It doesn't work that way

I'm not alone. I have friends. Some are real close and good friends. People I love, who's love I trust. Unconditioned. All the way. 100 %. I don't want to scare the ones I love. You don't expose them to your anxiety. To your irresolution. You don't expose the people you love to your suicide thoughts.